Let’s Talk About Love Baby…
With Valentine’s Day that just passed and the topic of love being on everyone’s minds – there is one of the most important aspects of love that gets forgotten – self-love.
People are so focused on getting love from outside sources that we sometimes forget that it is most important to first truly love yourself before you can fully love someone else. I mean love all of yourself, even when you screw up – exactly as you are right now and show up for yourself right now.
So many times, we can get caught up in needing the love of another when we lack love for ourselves in the first place. Needing to fill that void and feel validated – but without truly loving yourself first and feeling worthy and valid as a human being – you are prone to compromising yourself in relationships and losing your self-worth.
“Self-respect, self-worth and self-love, all start with self. Stop looking outside of yourself for your value.” – Rob Liano
I have completely struggled internally with self-love most of my life and had to build the foundation from scratch well into my adulthood. Without having self-love as a foundation, especially as a woman, I went out into the world seeking my own validation from outside sources.
Until I had compromised so much of myself that the thought of loving myself sounded like a joke. I was stubborn, I made wrong choices, learned the hard way and never listened to anyone – determined to do it my own way (which I still very much do).
I felt that I had f***** up so many times that my worthiness and validation as a person on this planet might be questionable.
“Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes. Because even mistakes mean you’re trying.” – Unknown
What you have to remember is that you need to breathe and cut yourself some slack. Are you going to make mistakes? YES that is a part of life, but you shouldn’t expect perfection from yourself – EVER. As long as you get back up and are moving forward to push for something better, something you dream of and something you know you are worthy of – that’s all that matters my friend. Learn from the mistakes of the past, then they are no longer mistakes – they are just learning lessons.
One of the greatest tools for building your foundation of self-love is through affirming it to yourself every day. Showing up for yourself every day. Doing something for yourself every day.
Become mindful of how you talk to yourself and what you are allowing in your life. Where are you compromising your self-worth that you can change right now?
Here are the things I want you to know right now and I want you to say them to yourself out loud (yes I am serious). If you don’t say them to yourself – who else is going to?
You are worthy.
You are beautiful.
You are valid as a person.
You are here for a reason.
You have a choice.
I love you.
Life is What You Choose